in·de·ci·sion noun \ˌin-di-ˈsi-zhən\ – a wavering between two or more possible courses of action

Indecision is killing me right now!!  I’m not sure why it is so hard for me to make a decision.  Actually I do know… fear of making the wrong decision is keeping me from making any choice at all.  Knowing this reason isn’t making it any easier though.  It’s so frustrating!!

If it were just me depending on me to make the right choice, I think I would be OK.  What puts the pressure on is knowing that my husband and two children also expect me to make the best decision.  If I screw it up, they suffer too.  My kids are old enough now to know what is going on and to remember the consequences, should there by any.  Add in the economic uncertainty in every aspect of all of our lives right now, and that pressure feels like it is about to boil over.

Should I submit my resume on that job?  Should I even be looking at a job change right now at all?  Should I make that purchase or leave the money in savings? Should we make those repairs to our house?  Should we still be looking to move? Question after question.

Deep down inside, I know that no matter what decisions I/We make… we will be OK.  We always are and we are usually stronger as well.  Sometimes it just takes longer to come to that realization.  🙂

In the meantime, I plan to research all of my options.  Talk about them with my husband and then make a choice and stick to it.  Should there be consequences down the road, we will face them together.

Do you have a hard time making choices?  How do you handle indecision?

I’m not exactly sure how it happened, but somewhere over the last 2-3 months I have become a romance novel enthusiast.  I typically am drawn to non-fiction like biographys and memoirs instead of fiction.

It all started when a few girlfriends of mine were reading the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy by E.L. James.  I joined in reading them so I could participate in the discussions during baseball practice for our sons (have to pass the time someway).  While I enjoyed the books and couldn’t wait to see how Christian and Ana’s story played out, I didn’t think I would discover how much I love this whole new genre of romance.

Once I finished the three Fifty Shades books, I went to Amazon to try and find some new reading material.  There are so many free or extremely cheap books for Kindle download there.  I decided on several downloads and started reading Maid for Love by Marie Force (the Kindle edition is FREE).  I loved this book!!  It is well written with a great love story.  There is some hot and steamy sex inside (that is very tastefully written), but Force’s book focused more on the love story between Mac and Maddie and their life on Gansett Island.  There are five more books in this series that are all equally as good!  I can’t wait for the next book to come out.  And did I mention that I could totally live on Gansett Island?!?

I also took a chance on a historical romance novel… Sweet Release by Pamela Clare.  I am not the type that is drawn to historical stories.  I never read them and very rarely do I catch a historically set movie.   Sweet Release changed all of that for me.  I could not put this book down.  It tells the tale of Cassie and Alex’s love.  There are so many twists and turns to their love story and even some villains set out to ruin any chance they have to being happy.  Totally loved it.  There is another book in this series available now and more being written as we speak.

Check out the Gansett Island Series by Marie Force:

 

Check out the Kenleigh/Blackwell Series by Pamela Clare:

 

Do you read romance novels?  What are some of your favorites?  I’d love to add some new titles to my reading list. 

 

 

 

I finally had a chance to sit down and watch the two-hour premiere of Dallas over the weekend.  I loved the original series and I’m really hoping TNT’s remake is just as good.

 

 

Right after our son was born, the original Dallas series played on FX in order and in its entirety.  It holds a special place in my heart.  Sounds stupid right?  Let me explain.  It came on at 10:00 or 10:30 in the evening (I can’t remember exactly).  It was perfect timing for us.  I would put the baby to bed and the hubby and I would crawl into our bed and relax watching the show.  During that super hectic first year of having J, our time watching Dallas was “our time”.  Monday through Friday we had a date every night to watch the show together.  I really got into it.  I was too young to understand the show when it came on originally, so all of those reruns were practically new to me.  I couldn’t wait to see what JR and Sue Ellen would do to each other next or how Bobby and JR would double cross each other this week.

 

 

I liked these first two episodes.  Some of the past history was laid out for the viewer, but it really just jumped right back into the double crossing, back stabbing ways of the Ewings.  JR is still very much JR… you love to hate him.  His son John Ross certainly picked up on his daddy’s behavior.  Bobby and his son Christopher are not pushovers either.  They have no problem fighting for what they think is right.  I hope this series does well.

I do have one request… JR can you do something about those eyebrows?  They are so distracting.  LOL

For more information on the show you can visit Dallas online, like their Facebook Page or follow the show on Twitter.

Did you watch the new series premiere of Dallas?  What are your thoughts about it?

 

 

 

We took the kids to play Putt Putt this weekend.  The hubby and I were sharing the score keeping duty.  At the 15th hole, I see him over at one of the stands that you can use to write on and I just assumed that he was working on our score card.  The next thing I know he said that I wouldn’t believe what someone had written on the stand.  I walked over to take a look and he had written “Hubby ♥’s Wifey” using our names of course.  This coming from a man who is not publically romantic at all. I told him how sweet that was and then he planted a kiss on me…. in front of other people.  WOW!!!

Even after 16 years together he still suprises me and he can still make me feel like he did in the very beginning.

 

I ran into someone who used to be one of my very best friends at the grocery store over the weekend.  I have not seen nor spoken to her in over two years now.   I find it bizarre that it took this long to come face to face with her when we live in the same town and less than a mile from each other.

I have often thought about what I would say to her and how I would feel about it.  Our friendship ended because of a lie that her husband (my husband’s close friend) told about us in order to advance himself.  An act of betrayal.  You can read another post about the situation here.  I know that what happened is not her fault, but at the same time, she never reached out to either of us to offer any support… to offer an apology… not even to try to find out what happened.  It is like we ceased to exist after that day.   That aspect hurts just as bad as the betrayal.

I wondered if I would give her a piece of my mind.  If I would try to humiliate her or try to make her feel bad for the things he did.  I wondered if I would demand an apology.  In the end, when we came face to face in the aisle, I did not care to speak to her at all.  I chose not to acknowledge her.  It was obvious that we both saw each other; we looked each other in the eye.  I did not feel hate.  I did not feel anger.  I did not feel anything towards her.

I refuse to let either of them or that whole fiasco have any more control over my life.  Her husband did his best to destroy us, but he did not succeed.  In fact, this whole incident has made my husband and I stronger, our relationship was strengthened and we were brought even closer.

I walked out of that store with my head held high.  I loaded the groceries in the car and drove away.  The funny part is, when I turned on the radio, Gotye’s song was playing….    Somebody that I used to know.  In a weird way, I felt like karma was trying to tell me “It’s OK Girl, I got your back.” 🙂